My mother gave me candy...

     it squirted in my eye.

     My sister gave me handkerchiefs...

     they made me itch and cry.

     My father gave me boxing gloves...

     I touched them and they burst.

     Why ever does my birthday

     have to fall on April first?

            ---"My Mother Gave Me Candy"

            from It's Raining Pigs and Noodles

            by Jack Prelutsky